Shall we dine?
Each Tuesday my grandmother has a family lunch where she invites friends and family to have traditional southern food. The cast of characters changes every week, with two of her sons (my father included) as the only regulars. The other people switch out every week, according to who is around, who can make it, who she wants to visit with, etc. 
We all get together in the fancy dining room and eat chicken and dumplings, fried okra, collard greens, butter beans, field peas, corn, gumbo, and hoe cakes: whatever she and her cook can dream up.
This weekend my family duties continued, and I took my cousins over to visit with our grandmother on Sunday. {She had bought pepper spray for all the girls in the family, just in case.} While we were there visiting we helped her get the table set for Tuesday. She goes all out with the silver and the china, so we had to set everything just so and line everything up appropriately.
It struck me that perhaps children aren't schooled in these types of graces anymore. My cousins and I actually went to courses in dining etiquette. I chatted with my grandmother about the various dishes and platters and china patterns for a while. I love to go over there and hear what all the different plates and serving pieces are for, but I could tell my younger cousins were really not into it. They humor her, though, which is as much as I can expect.
I think it's kind of sad that that kind of formality seems to be slipping away from our culture. Though I wouldn't want to eat like that every day, it concerns me that everything is so casual these days. Most of the time I want to be casual, too, but it still seems like a shame. I remember dressing up to go on airplanes and to go to birthday parties. What happened to gracious living?
"Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy."
--Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
We all get together in the fancy dining room and eat chicken and dumplings, fried okra, collard greens, butter beans, field peas, corn, gumbo, and hoe cakes: whatever she and her cook can dream up.
This weekend my family duties continued, and I took my cousins over to visit with our grandmother on Sunday. {She had bought pepper spray for all the girls in the family, just in case.} While we were there visiting we helped her get the table set for Tuesday. She goes all out with the silver and the china, so we had to set everything just so and line everything up appropriately.
It struck me that perhaps children aren't schooled in these types of graces anymore. My cousins and I actually went to courses in dining etiquette. I chatted with my grandmother about the various dishes and platters and china patterns for a while. I love to go over there and hear what all the different plates and serving pieces are for, but I could tell my younger cousins were really not into it. They humor her, though, which is as much as I can expect.
I think it's kind of sad that that kind of formality seems to be slipping away from our culture. Though I wouldn't want to eat like that every day, it concerns me that everything is so casual these days. Most of the time I want to be casual, too, but it still seems like a shame. I remember dressing up to go on airplanes and to go to birthday parties. What happened to gracious living?
"Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy."
--Ambrose Bierce (1842 - 1914), The Devil's Dictionary
1 Comments:
i totally agree w/this post! what is wrong with using the good china every now and then? or looking nice? it's almost like we don't value our worth or our time anymore.
what gets me are the people who wear jeans and flip flops to church. or the girls who wear strapless dresses. my mother would have a heart attack!
i think it is wonderful that your family can all get together like that. i am very jealous. i never met three of my grandparents. the fourth died when i was little. i have a grand total of 4 cousins, three aunts and two uncles. that's it. and we are spread out all over God's creation, so we have never all been in the same room, at least, not since about 1991. treasure these lunches. some people can't even dream of such get-togethers.
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