Another year older
Tomorrow is my 31st birthday.
I will be 31.
3-1.
Thirty one.
Nope. No matter how I write it, it still looks ridiculous.
How can I possibly be 31? Most days I feel like I'm 17 and should be turning in my chemistry homework or something. I certainly don't feel how I've imagined 31 should feel. Adult and composed? Togther? Reponsible? Successful? Yeah, I almost never feel like that.
Seriously. Where did the time go? Wasn't I just skipping school and lying to my parents about where I was at night? Wasn't I just having lots of sex in the backseats of cars? Seems like only yesterday I was sneaking out and puking in bushes and wearing leggings under babydoll dresses. Can it have been 14 years since I skipped school and went to the sink holes to skinny dip and drink Natural Light that scraggly rednecks bought for us at the Junior Food Store? And much longer since I smoked weed out of a Coke can?
How on earth can I be 31? You should have seen me last year at 30. Can you say mental breakdown? Because I can. A lot. Every day for like a month I woke up in dread of turning 30. So, I'm actually doing better this year. And it's not like I actually think 31 is all that ancient. Of course it's not. It just doesn't feel... like me. Yet. Maybe it will. Maybe this will be the year I get my shit together.
Yeah. Right. I don't think that will ever happen, and if it did, it would be so out of character.
So, here's to 31 years of G.
"To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable." --Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900), The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891
4 Comments:
Happy Birthday! I came here wanting to thank you for your comment on my blog, and then I found that you were experiencing thoughts very similar to mine about turning 31.
A few days ago I had one of those moments where I had to tell my age and for the life of me I couldn't remember how old I was. I said 30 at first, and then was like, wait I think I'm 31, and then that sounded so strange I had to really ponder whether it was POSSIBLE that I was actually THIRTY ONE years old.
I just turned 31 in December, and I definitely don't feel 31. I feel not a day older than 19, except that I feel far wiser than I did back then. Wiser and also aware of everything I don't know (which makes me feel even younger!).
Like you I'm shocked that I still don't have my shit together. I totally thought that would happen by the time I was 30. But it turns out, I'm still me, just with more laugh lines, and now an excuse to have tons of sex since I've reached my "sexual peak" as it were. :)
Does anyone actually reach a point where they feel like they've got it all figured out?
Anyway, enjoy it. I hope you have a wonderful day!!
I'm 36. I still can't believe it. How can I be inching closer and closer to the big 4-0?! The trick is not to think about it otherwise you'll just go barmy!
Best wishes for your birthday!! Hope it's a fun one!
31's not so bad. I hit it a few months ago. While I certainly don't have everything together, live is looking a whole lot more together now than it did five or ten years ago, so that has to count for something!
(Michele sent me, by the by.)
Happy Birthday to you! Hey, you'll make a great 31. I've decided my plan is not to act old and turn into someone I don't know anymore....lol! Enjoy your day! Here from Michele's!
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